domingo, 31 de julio de 2011

Day 60: Churros, my last day of college and the arrival of G and Sam!

If I'm not online by 8 am, I receive a friendly little wake-up call from my favorite Romanian. I then click, “ignore” and peel myself out of bed and over to Kiwi to get my computer time in for the morning before getting the bus at 8:38 am. So when L called me this morning at 7:15, I figured it was an unusually early wake-up call, and clicked “ignore” and continued snoozing. So when she called a second time, I made myself answer.

“Hello sleepyhead! Somebody here wants to say 'Good Morning' to you!”

I waited for a voice and next thing I knew, Sam was greeting me!!! ^_^ OMG!

I was so excited Grandma and Sam were actually in Spain and that Larisa had picked them up so early (6:40 am – damn) that there was no way I could go back to sleep, even though I had been up late worrying a bit about my finals. So I showered. ^_^

Just as I was drying myself off, Jesus knocked on the door to tell me he'd woken up early and gone and got me a bag full of churros and a cupful of dipping chocolate!! Cruz came over and told me to hurry and get dressed so I could enjoy them! When I told them both that Grandma and Sam were here, they both became very excited. :)

While I was eating my churros (YUMMY!) my madre asked me when my bus left for school, 'cause she was comin' with me!! Aww – she took me to school the first day, and was taking me to school the last day! ^_^ Cute! She had to go to the CIEE office to drop of her student evaluation (I wonder what it is families write in those evaluations and what the purpose is? It's not like I could call Cristina up and ask her to fax it over to submit to my new landlord? Nor can she submit it to my school to say I could never study abroad again because my family wrote a bad evaluation...?), and while she was in the office, got to meet “Angel” Dave!! Hee hee hee!

(Later I'd ask her what she thought of him and she remarked that he was VERY attractive – LOL.)

I went into my Spanish Business test having studied for a grand total of 7 minutes (and that's a bit of a hyperbole) and just started filling in answers. Where they all right? Probably not. But sometimes I believe confidence is key – lol. Taking an hour with a test that takes ten minutes to fill out is not going to guarentee you a better score if you just simply don't know some of the answers, so let's just not waste everybody's time pretending, kthnxbai.

Getting done with the test so quickly allowed me time to explore Alcala for a good few hours! I went to the store on Calle Mayor that has Muppets, but of course they only muppet they DIDN'T have was Kermit (wtf?)... so I journeyed on and stopped in Cervante's house to take a quick tour (something I'd been meaning to do since the first day of school!). It was fairly small and completely restored so it didn't even almost feel like a house from half a milenium ago... but I felt complete having lived in Alcala for so long and finally visited it! When I was done, I went to sit on the bench with Don Quijote and Sancho to begin studying for Ernesto's test, but quickly realized I was markerless!! HOW could I take an Ernesto test without many, many colors?

 

 I'd lent my markers to Megan for her hobby horse project and totally forgotten to get them back from her (and, at this point, I'd forgotten I'd even lent them to her, so I just simply had no idea where they were, period.)... so I did the only rational thing I could think of – went on a mission to Folder, the nicest papeleria in town, to buy more!

Copious amounts of colorful markers secured, it was study time in the courtyard garden on campus. I tried to focus, but between knowing that was the last time I'd be in that beautiful place and the ants that were going up my shorts and biting me in inappropriate places, it was all for naught. Before I knew it, it was noon and I packed up my literature packet and pouch of markers and hoped Ernesto had been serious when he'd promised us the day before that this test would be embarrassingly easy!

And it was. (Thanks, Ernesto!!)

I answered every question in a different colored marker, drew three fancy top hats and a nice big Kermit the Frog on the back page before turning it in, assuring Ernesto that I'd be in Madrid for another few weeks and that we'd see each other before I left for the US, and ran out of the classroom and down the stairs doing a jig, singing to myself, “I'm done with college! I'm done with college!! Tra lala! Tra lala!” until

*KERPLOP*

I got so into my song and dance that I missed a stop and

toppled
down
the stairs!!

>_<
FAIL.

I sat there for a moment on the ground, a little stunned by my clumsiness and wondering if L hadn't rubbed off on me a little too much. People passed by and I just looked up and smiled at them, as if I were supposed to be sprawled on the floor for some academic reason, all the while grateful as could be that Ernesto hadn't seen it go down (I prefer to believe I come across as a fairly put-together individual around the man, and this surely would have given it away – lol).

When I finally got my butt off the floor I was once again doing my jig, bounding out the door and making a beeline for the RENFE train station to go into Madrid – 'cause after all, Grandma and Sam were WAITNG for me there!!!

First stop? KFC for hot wings for L. :) Strangest guilty pleasure I've ever heard of, but after waking up at 5 to go to the airport to pick my family up from the airport and take them to their hotel, it seemed like the perfect mini “thank you” lunch I could think of considering my time crunch! I met her at the park near her work to trade hot wings, Aquarius (it's like Gatorade) and a cute little chocolate tart from the market tied up in strings for stories about Grandma and Sam's arrival that morning! ^_^

Before I knew it we were knocking on their hotel room door and there they were! Right in front of me, in Spain!! ^_^ L hung out for a little while with us while G and Sam slowly roused themselves from the jet-lagged slumber. After she had to go back to work, the three of us went to Atocha to buy train tickets to Barcelona (I got them in Spanish. It was a huge WIN for me, but a huge annoyance to G who demanded the woman repeat everything that had just gone down before turning over her credit card.), to McDonald's for a quick snack and then Starbucks for free internet to book the hotel in Barcelona for the two nights we'd spend there after the cruise.

L met up with us again at that point...

 

... and we took G and Sam on a mini walking tour of central Madrid from Atocha to Sol (Sam was on a mission to buy a Spanish fan, as he saw everybody using them and was roasting in the Madrid heat) to Opera to the Royal Palace (where he was mesmerized by a man making huge bubbles on the street for money) to a stop in a garden for little flowers... 

 

...to Templo de Debod to a hole in the wall place for a light Spanish dinner and back to their hotel to drop them off for the night. :)


It was quite the whirlwind of a day and left me ridiculously pooped by the time the night bus dropped us off at home around 3 am. >_< DAMN!

XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

miércoles, 27 de julio de 2011

Day 59: La Rana Gustavo

To say I was stressed this morning would be a ridiculous understatement. I had meant to finish my Desigual paper last night, but skyped my mom, dad and Brazilian instead. I had meant to work on my Desigual presentation, but as it turns out, my compy doesn't have Powerpoint. I meant to get to school plenty early to finish all of this, but my internet card wouldn't work and I wasted fifteen minutes yelling at it before I finally changed computers and it magically worked. I was nervous during my presentation and spent class time worrying about all the things I forgot to write in my essay. By the time class was done, I was so on edge that all I could think to do was to go on a serious stroll in search of pastries. Even chocolate croissant and pina juice man wasn't there (nor was the nepolitana chocolate)... and that's when I really lost my shit.

So when I found a store called, "Mas que galletas" ("More than cookies") with a little lady carefully decorating a batch of freshly baked cut out cookies with her two year old son and a case full of cupcakes and cheesecakes and torts, I decided Ernesto's class could deal with me arriving a little late in the name of my pastry addiction being the only thing that could quell my nerves.

Wrong-o, bong-o.

I did my best to duck into class more than five minutes late, but seeing as I sit in the first seat of the first row, that didn't so much work out. I was so embarrassed that I was showing up late to the last official day of my beloved Ernesto's class that I sunk down in my chair and altogether avoided glancing in his general direction lest me catch my gaze and glare at me for my rudeness. I was certain I'd go down in his book as that "one girl who'd come to class epically late and fall asleep during break so soundly that she often appeared dead and every once in awhile didn't even wake up in time when break was over." GREAT. Just what I wanted: the first professor I've had in forever whom I actually respect and adore thinking I'm just another American dolt.

So when I finally glanced up, I was completely unprepared for what I saw.

There Ernesto was, pacing back and forth in front of us, wearing his usual jeans, red pumas and a black shirt... with a humongous, almost 3-D seeming Kermit the Frog on it.


I did a double take and then began giggling. I couldn't help it. This man was too good (and too clever) to be true.

Ernesto maintained his composure, going on and on about uh... I'm not sure what (how could I pay attention at a time like this?!) despite hearing my sudden onslaught of giggles and when he glanced in my direction, I was sure he was going to give me a warning look, as if to say, "please stop interrupting my uber important lecture on something you're not even grasping right now with your silly giggles," but instead he cracked a tiny, almost undetectable smile and winked at me.

(For any of you who are not following and understanding just how AWESOME this whole thing truly was, please refer to my blog post Day 30.)

I realize Ernesto and I exchanged blog addresses sometime back in June. I realize we are Facebook friends. But it never dawned on me that somebody with as much importance as Ernesto would ever take the time to actually READ my blog. "Oh, shit!" was all I could think; my blog is my place to tell it like it is, and I let my praise for the man and his classes fly freely. Perhaps had I known there was even a small chance he's read any of it, I would have tried to come across a little less exuberant and enthused about the whole thing. Damn.

At break time he came up to me smiling and proclaimed, "See? I told you you'd laugh." (Indeed, he even had posted it on my Facebook wall earlier today!) Oh, Ernesto. The fact that the second half of the class dealt with a play about the meaning of death and the idea that death is merely a continuation of life (and the fact that he may or may not have had me and my incessant comments and complaints about the narrow mindedness of Spain's creative class with respect to death in mind when picking this piece as the final "obra" we learned in the course) was mere frosting (funfetti, of course) on the cake.

After class I made sure to get an epic picture of the Kermit shirt and then made a mad dash for it. Generally, Ernesto and I talk a little bit after class about what we'd just gone over, but despite the fact that today was the last day we could do that, I was too taken aback by the whole thing to know what to say. Nobody tops my creativity and tenacity. Certainly not a professor. But Ernesto proved to be the most worthy of contenders! 

As I exited the room, I heard somebody ask about his shirt, and Ernesto smiled and replied something along the lines of "It's a secret message."

It's an extremely rare moment when I feel like somebody just... "gets it." It's an even rarer moment when I feel like somebody just... gets who I am. My Spanish wasn't always the greatest, sometimes I'd be epically late for class, other times I'd pass out on the desk, consuming my ten minute break. Not all of my comments were profound and every once in awhile I'd decide doodling a million tiny animals was more important than taking notes for a certain poem. But despite all of this, I feel as though Ernesto saw the exact me that I aspire to be -- that intelligent, intellectual, existential, creative, unique, tenacious, sanguine, sarcastic, greatful girl I'm working on bringing closer to the surface.

At times I literally felt like he could SEE that part of me and it challenged me to expand her role in my everyday life and practice being who I want to be. For Ernesto's class to be the very last class of my college career is more perfect than I could have ever planned. Yeah - I learned a lot about poetry and modern literature; a lot about my fascination with the Eastern view of death; a lot about how many stereotypes of American students aren't so much stereotypes as unfortunate truths... but more than all of this I learned that there are people who somehow are able to recognize me for who I really am (or at least am practicing on being) and are willing to do crazy and silly things to make me know this to be the truth.

If I were to create a list of the top three people who have changed who I am and how I see myself and life while I've been here in Spain, Ernesto would without a doubt be on this list. With so much packing to do and obsessively tracking Grandma and Sam's flight (they're over the ocean now!!), I am unable to express my true gratitude for this, but when I have time, be sure the thank you letter will write itself (preferably in poetry, but prose will most likely win out).

XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

martes, 26 de julio de 2011

Day 58: Two days left...

A year ago today the Brazilian left the USA to go back to Brazil. As he waved goodbye to me with tears in his eyes, all I could do was run away. I ran until he couldn't see me and then lost it. I cried and cried and sat in Moxie and cried some more. Brazilian had left (and J was about to move, too) and now I was all on my own. I didn't know if I'd see him again. I didn't know what would happen in the next year. I knew I'd be okay, but I didn't know how. All I knew was I had that afternoon to cry and then I had to be a big girl and work hard.

A whole year later and I'm looking back on that sweet little girl crying in her car, listening ironically to Fergie's "Big Girls Don't Cry" on repeat feeling so alone. All I can do is cry along with her and whisper, "Look where you got yourself, Chels!" A week and a half later I'd landed a job at Hooters so I could start saving up for my month long trip to Brazil. Four months later I was landing in Belo Horizonte looking out the window at the lush landscape, completely incredulous I was there and he was there to get me in my silly purple sweat pants. When he grabbed me from behind while I was trying to call him in the airport, I melted. I'd done it! I'd feared an end but hadn't let myself give in to that fear - I'd worked hard and was there. Six months later and I'd found out I'd been accepted into the study abroad program in Spain. Ten months later and I was studying in Madrid. And today - I'm here looking back on it all and smiling, thinking how Brazilian would say, "Oh, Chelsinha" to me and realizing he was serious when he said he wanted to always be a part of my life - despite an ocean.

 S2

When I got my tattoo redone earlier this year, I decided to surround my Orange Soda bottle with Sakura blossoms. Traditionally and symbolically, cherry blossoms represent the beauty of the ephemeral. Cherry blossom trees have hundreds and hundreds of blossoms, but they only last a few days before they fall off the tree. The trick is, there are always a hundred more where those came from in different colors and with unique details.

Ever since I can remember, I've had difficulty with the idea of "endings." I used to spend every day fearing my mom would die; I had reoccurring nightmares of the day high school was done and I had to drive off to college crying hysterically; I would obsess over how a relationship I had just begun would end and whose fault it would be and how broken-hearted I would feel -- I even feared the ending of my heap of extra sour cream on my Taco Bell Nacho Supreme, ultimately leading to me hardly eating any sour cream with my nachos and being left with a huge blob of it when I had finished!

The way I'd grown accustomed to living was to fear the shriveling up of the beautiful sakura blossom so completely that I completely forgot to notice its beauty while it was alive.

And so when it was time to add to my tattoo - I realized the most important reminder I could get tattooed on myself was a reminder to always live in the NOW. A reminder that everything is to some extent ephemeral and to always find the beauty in the moment instead of the fear the end of it. A reminder that things only "end" when you're ready for them to "end." A reminder that beauty and opportunity and experiences are plentiful if you are open to them, so that an ending only signifies the beginning of your next step in your journey. And - most importantly - a reminder that endings are nothing but an illusion ... something that the Brazilian and many other things had begun to show me in the recent past.

<3

That day in the park my first week in Spain when Conor came and played his song for me, I could feel him reminding me to look at my tattoo and take what I'd learned to heart.

I can say in all honesty, it's never hit me that one day I will have to get on a plane and go back to the US. Not even as I write this am I comprehending that. I just feel very... here. I feel very... now. And I love it here and now. And I feel so peaceful about that. <3

I only have two days left of school, hanging out with my CIEE friends and living in my sweet little room with my familia... but I can't tell. :) The next few weeks will be adventure upon adventure but I'm not thinking about that, either. All I'm thinking about is the life I've grown accustomed to here - what kind of yogurt is for dessert and how many scoops of sugar I can sneak into it before anybody sees me... if I should siesta now and shower later or shower now and run out of time to siesta because I'll get distracted by something I remember I have to do while showering... if I can get enough work done on my paper to see L after work and if it'll leave me with enough energy to walk back home at 1:30 am thanks to the silly night bus... ^_^

My life here with school (Ernesto, Little Gay Professor Man, Mar - aka the girl that seriously looks like Rachel F. from my Hooters in 20 years) and friends (Megan, Andy, Dave) and family (Cruz, Jesus, Maria, Jorge, Deu) has been beyond anything I could have ever dreamed up. The past two months have truly been amazing.

Yet at the same time, Hilary Duff gets it right in her song, "Metamorphosis" when she says, "It gets me nervous but it makes me calm / to see life all around me moving on."

Suddenly it occurs to me that "growth" and "metamorphosis" isn't a one time deal - it's continually happening if you allow it to ... leaving my fam and the University of Alcala and my friends I've made here (being done with college as of Thursday and succeeding in graduating a year early!!!) doesn't mean my metamorphosis is complete... it means I'm ready for the next part!!

BRING IT, guys. I feel more than prepared. The past two months have shown me a world and a side to me I never knew existed. I can't WAIT to see how life tries to top this. ;)

XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

lunes, 25 de julio de 2011

Day 57: Ceceo and L

I'm adding this part to this blog a few days late in hopes of tricking L. ;) I know that girl reads my blog religiously and so I try not to say too much... but maybe this way I can say what I am thinking and she'll skip over the entry...? I bet she's too thorough for that, but it's worth a shot! Hee hee.

Today boasts the title of "Biggest Fight I've Had Since I Can Remember." I've had disputes, I've felt upset, I've gotten angry... but I haven't felt safe enough to just let go and talk back since high school. Sure, I only "let go" and "talked back" for a few minutes total, but I mentally held my ground. I was threatened, yeah, but it didn't bother me. Fights are a weird animal - they signal something is not right, but when you feel safe enough to be a little bitch about something, it shows a certain about of caring and trust. Such a combination is something I have not had the "luxury" of experiencing since Stephen. And boy, when we'd fight, we'd fight. Epic fights. And they'd always make me feel a little closer to him in some messed up teenage way. Now I'm starting to see why.

On the flip side, it's a weird thing to experience for the first time in six years as my perspective is completely different. I'm not fighting because I'm taking things personally - I'm fighting because all communication seems to have been thrown under a high speed train and I'm scrambling to get it back without being pushed onto the tracks, too. And what's more is that I can only keep up the verbal fight for a few minutes before I stop and need time to ponder about the true motives for the other's upset and what the best course of action is for me to take knowing this information and grasping it to the best of my ability.

I've been taught to see others as innocent, but sometimes that seems sort of inconsiderate? Is it mean to see somebody as innocent like a little kid and treat the situation accordingly? I'm not sure. But I know more about kids than I do people my own age, so I went for a middle road.

The thing I appreciate most about tithers with L is that I never lose who I am in them. This is something I haven't felt in ages, either. For once, the way I view and love myself is not on the line. I am free to continue my life after it is over, versus seeing everything as an imminent, swirling doom that I have somehow brought upon myself. Somehow, good 'ol old-fashioned tither techniques such as name calling and the use of "you" phrases are comforting, because at least I can see through them -- in a crazy Goya's Las Menina's play on perspective with mirrors. I can also listen better (and understand).

I'm not sure how to learn from this. I wish tithers with everybody were as safe feeling... even though I realize that sounds ridiculous. I'm not sure if it's something I can work on, or if it's totally dependent on the interactions of each pair of human beings.

Anyway, I'm sorry for using the poor word choice of "I seriously don't care." Even though it was completely taken out of context (I was talking about my food preference), I know how it came across and I would never ever ever want you to think that's what I meant. Because it isn't. It's no where close. <3


~*~


Email to my Spanish Phonology professor in regards to the mysteriousness of the Spanish ceceo (where words with "ci" "ce" and "z" are turned into the "th" sound, but "s" never is):

Hola!

Greetings from Spain!
I've been in Madrid all summer studying and have had a question on my mind this whole time just for you!! :)

I've noticed the ceceo (in fact, I now speak that way, otherwise people literally can't understand me! haha)... but I'm wondering about the historical reasoning behind it. Last I heard it was due to one of Spain's king's lisps... and so he declared that the whole country should have to speak like he did. However, this does not make sense as it only occurs with ci/ce/z and never s. Unless you know how to SPELL each word, it's impossible to know in spoken language which words require ceceo and which do not. Knowing that literacy was not a country-wide thing a few hundred years ago, I'm completely confused as to how this process remains so perfect that 's' never goes to 'th' but ce/ci/z always do without fail.

Help! :)
C

Quick response from my Spanish Phonology professor from UW-Madison:

Hi C,

Good to hear from you! I hope you're enjoying your time in Madrid. I'm sure you're having a blast and won't want to come back when the summer is up!

Your question is a good one and is quite complicated actually. The short version is that medieval Spanish and 8 sibilant (fricative/affricate) phonemes, from which the affricates lost a portion of their sounds and became fricatives. From there, the next phase of sound change was voiced fricatives merging with voiceless ones. One of remaining phonemes was dentoalveolar, which ended up being articulatorily very similar to /s/ (both corresponded with different graphemes, which had a huge influence on sound change, even though, as you said, everyone wasn't literate). In order to distance itself from /s/, the dentoalveolar moved forward and became interdental, thus we have the ceceo. Due to the norm that people began to speak with, largely based on spelling and scribes, the ceceo became entrenched as part of normal speech in the central and northern parts of Spain. Those that did not know how to spell basically assimilated with regional norms.


I could write for hours and hours on this topic because there are so many theories as to why this happened, but this is the most accepted version (in a nutshell). The thing about the king having a lisp is truly a myth. The reason that there is such a categorical distinction still is because historically, the /s/ and ceceo derived from two different sounds, which is why speakers in Spain naturally distinguish them.

Hope this makes sense! Take care!

Best,
Prof. Rao

Days 54-56: The Pithy Version

Friday morning was spent with Dave and our mission to get tapas for breakfast. Haha. I finally got to El Tigre and while being a wee bit buzzed at for breakfast was something that's only happened to me once before, it was still a pretty funny feeling. Oh, Tinto de Verano - you're not supposed to have enough alcohol content to get a girl feeling dizzy in the A.M. Haha. El Tigre gave us a serious heaping plate of tapas along with our drinks and we managed the whole affair for 5 euro. Damn. When she told us the price and my jaw dropped, the lady giggled and said, "Yeah,we're real inexpensive here." Hee hee. Her little 11 year old son was serving the tapas in his little mini-sized wifebeater and it all felt so very quaint and Spanish. There were business men there on a quick break with their beer and heaping plate of tapas as well as just the average, everyday dude reading a paper with his feast. Charming. The rest of the day was spent picking up his cousin and friend from the airport, going home to pack my bag and then leaving home for the long weekend (Monday's a holiday here).

Saturday was a lazy day (muy perezoso) filled with Spanish MTV, grocery shopping run and a stroll through the uber cheap Spanish version of Kohl's. We'd been reading a magazine with those pages where they have stars' looks and then how you can pull it off for cheap and I found a pic of Leighton Meister in a really cute lemony get-up and the cheap version of it was 6 euro! Needless to say, my lemon-dress radar found the lemon dress in no time and I quickly ran for the dressing room. The dressing room smelled like fresh lemons and I had a split second where I wondered if my lemon dress wasn't a scratch and sniff variety as well... but it quickly occurred to me that in fact the room had just been cleaned with lemon spray - phew!

Sunday was an exploring day! Yay! We walked around for almost eight hours and I was beyond pooped by the end of it, but the little town was so adorably quaint and it was quite worth it! ^_^


 Being silly outside the Royal Palace. ^_^

 Woohoo!!

Tra la la!!

 Mini taxi! *beep beep*

 Adorable! <3

 The tree had never felt so loved! ;)


XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

jueves, 21 de julio de 2011

Day 53: It's JULY 21!! OMFG!!!

Guess what today is?!?!?!
July 21st!!!
Guess what happened three years ago today!!! SCANDALOUSNESS!!! ^_^ OMG!!!
No, but really... had what happened three years ago today not happened... I would not be writing this blog, I wouldn't be in Spain,  and I would be NOBODY like who I am today. July 21, 2008 officially goes down as one of the most life-changingly awesome days of my existence. <3
In honor of today being July 21st, I present to you a Panda Dance outside of my favorite building in Alcala. (Special thanks to Dave in helping me out with it!)
Woohoo!!


Copious amounts of Panda love! <3

XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

miércoles, 20 de julio de 2011

52: National Library (and mini epiphanies)

I feel like my blog is getting blah 'cause I'm starting to feel... comfortable... here in Spain. I don't notice that it's weird to see ice cream stands every block nor that roundabouts are the norm and stop lights hardly exist in the outskirts of Madrid. I don't notice that it's weird to be surrounded by Spanish all throughout the day nor that two months ago I would have never dreamed of having a three course lunch everyday. Life in Spain seems... normal. I have friends, I like my fam, school's school, I still enjoy my alone time and I'm so over stressing out about what comes next. Either I get my student visa in time and I'm back in Spain in September to work on my Master's and student teach or I'm somewhere else in the world for a year making money and saving up for the Master's program next year. No matter what happens, life will still be a serendipitous adventure and I'll most likely be happy with whatever happens - and if I'm not, either I change it or I change my perspective.

It thrilled me to think today that I have three countries and three states in the USA that I could move to have have somebody excited for me to be near them. That's pretty sweet. It also thrilled me to realize that I have created this little bubble of bliss in a mere month and a half and that no matter where I end up in September, I've been working on who I am and how I relate to others just enough that I believe I will thrive no matter where I live. I keep thinking I'm old me. Pre-University Chelsea. Pre-Hooters Chelsea. Pre-Spain Chelsea. But I'm none of those Chelseas (or, I'm all of those Chelseas)... I'm who I am now. And, on the whole, I'm pretty content with who that is and what she's accomplished thus far.

No matter where I end up, freaking out about it now will not help me get to where I'm going. I can only impede me. And I know this - I just always forget. The epiphany was presented to me in the form of a poem today in Contemporary Spanish Literature with Ernesto. We read a poem written in the Franco-era about how life is all on a stage, but you never get a dress-rehearsal and by the time you realize this is the real deal, it's too late and you suddenly die and the play is all over. The poem made this sound like such a bleak truth and it angered me. "Why doesn't he see liberty in death?" I asked Ernesto, almost pleadingly. In usual form, Ernesto smiled and once again reminded me that Eastern thought had not yet arrived to Spain, so no such conclusions could be reached in the early 20th century such as that one.

And then it hit me - this poem bothered me so much because it's exactly what I revert to without noticing. I worry about something ending, I worry about not getting something I'm really working hard for and want, I worry that "something bad" will happen in the end and the end will hit me when I'm least expecting it and all my hope, energy and desire will have been for naught.

This is the real reason I got cherry blossoms tattooed around my orange soda bottle. I needed a reminder to focus on the positive. A reminder that while everything is ephemeral by nature, it is also paradoxically ever-lasting.

So for the first time since this visa business started, I'm willing to throw up my hands and let the Universe take this one over. If I'm supposed to do my masters this year in September, I will do everything in my power to obtain my visa, submit all the proper paperwork and do everything else I need to. But if I'm not supposed to do that quite yet, I will fearlessly see where life leads me next and I will go all in. ^_^

I feel so much lighter. Finally. *deep breath*

As far as today? Hung out with Dave at lunch watching askaninja.com (best lunch period of the summer - haha). Finally spoke up for the first time in Ernesto's class this week. I could tell the man was relieved/jubilant. Got home fast to have a quick lunch and then teased my padre into taking me to the train station on Moto!! ^_^ I <3 riding on his moto so so so so much!! I forget places are closer than a 20-60 public transportation ride. Haha. Five minutes? WHAT?! Haha. It felt like magic. ;) And I felt pretty badass pulling up to my group on the back of a Moto. ;)

Next it was off to Madrid to the National Library. Gotta say, I was expecting something a little more interesting... but it was cool to be where my professor from last semester would tell us she'd go to research Zayas and to feel what it must be like to be Mary Roach researching her next book all around the world in exclusively awesome libraries! ^_^ It was also cute that Ernesto kept showing me little tidbits of interest from June's class.

When I got home a few hours later my fam was on the patio and made me a frozen pizza (which I'd actually been craving all day long) and I sorta ate the ENTIRE thing (with a fork and a knife, of course - hahah). I've gotten used to chilling with them in Spanish and it no longer bothers me when I don't understand tidbits of the conversation... I just coast through it and daydream for a moment and then reenter the convo a little later. Ha.don't even notice anymore - how weird is that? I also barely notice I'm speaking in Spanish. I still notice that I make mistakes, but I don't feel like I have to plan out sentences before I say them -- I just kinda start rambling and 9 times out of 10 they'll have a clue as to what I'm trying to say. ;)

I'm sleepy and pooped and tired.
I think I'll spend my free Friday catching up on much needed me time and self-expression time.

XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

martes, 19 de julio de 2011

Day 51: Chill as a Cucumber 'n Happy as a Clam

I was thirty minutes late to class. I knew I would miss the first bus in the name of getting all cute for school for a change... but I was not prepared to miss the second bus. Nor was I prepared to meet a little old lady at the bus stop who talked my ear of for 15 minutes about the weather, my cute sandals, her foot/toe surgery and who-knows-what-else. In the whole time she only asked me two questions (both of which were si/no responses)... she never even figured out I was American / only understood a half of what she was saying! WOO! >_< Lol.

In the middle of class (once I FINALLY was gracious enough to SHOW UP) my phone started going off. "It's not even 10 am yet... who the heck would be txting me... much less multiple txts?? I don't even have credit left and L knows that... so it's not like she'd be txting me" I thought to myself. I figured it was Megan's phone out of credit again sending me copious amounts of "this person wants to speak with you but is a broke ass" messages... so when I looked at my phone and two were from L and one was from my phone company, I was confuzzled.

The first message was really cute. :) L's second message was just confusing: "Let me know if u got it. xoxo" The third one, from the company, was to tell me that money had been added to my phone!! ^_^


Cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuute!!!!!


It was the sweetest little surprise ever. I have no idea how she came up with it, but really... damn. The thought of going all day without any phone credit had not helped my mood when I realized I'd missed two buses... so when POOF! I suddenly was able to txt again, I was sooooooo grateful and happy!! Thanks, L! <3
At lunch, I saw Megan and realized we were bascially dressed the same. >_< Brother. So, naturally, I had to have a picture of this thing that happened "por causualidad." Haha. We were both trying to pull off our best, "I'm not American! I'm an Espanola!" look...


As we got out of our first class of the day early, Dave and I decided to make random askaninja - IN SPAIN and about ART HISTORY videos. It was pretty successful... not gonna lie.

 

Later on I met up with L in the Malasana district and had tea and a brownie a la mode at the cutest little cafe you ever did see while she sipped on a tinto de verano (omg yum). It was a pretty adorable way to conclude the day - like, if I could live like that every week, I'd call my life an official success. "What'd you do after school/work?" "Oh, nothing much. Met up with "a girl" at an adorably quaint and boho-chic cafe and sipped tea and had a pastry while we talked about our days and our travel plans together for the weekend."


This. Is. Real. Life. O_O <-- incredulous. <3

XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

lunes, 18 de julio de 2011

Day 50: Chill'n with the Fam ^_^

I fell asleep three times today during school. The last time I fell asleep during the 10 minute break in Ernesto's class and somehow did not wake up when class began again and nobody bothered to wake me up, either!! I suddenly sat up and realized we were half way through another poem and despite sitting in the very front seat of the class, not even Ernesto had bothered to bop me on the head to despertarme. Brother. >_<

I forgot that Business class had an extra hour this afternoon 'cause we have only an hour tomorrow morning. Brother. I was so in need of siesta (obviously) and yet couldn't have one because of BUSINESS class. Urg. I didn't get home 'til 4:15 but I got to walk home with Dave and that was great. :) We're gonna make movies tomorrow during our extra break 'cause of Business class. Yay.

I was excited to get home because I knew today I would be a homebody and hang with my fam all day long! Yay! ^_^ I <3 my fam again!! They giggle at me just as much as I giggle at them! They invited me to the Factory again and we had a hoot. I bought another Desigual skirt (shhhh... i can hear you judging me) 'cause it was only 15 euro and then found Pull & Bear bootcut jeans for 2,99 euro - haha. I think they look cute on my butt, but I had to get them just so I could call them my 2,99 euro jeans. HA. I also got Dave a present for his cumpleanos next week - cute!

After this we went to Corte Ingles, 'cause my madre needed to find a jacket for this elaborate outfit she's putting together for a big wedding in September. Jesus, Cruz and I went in earnest search of the jacket and found one, but not in the right size... but at least we know it exists, said Cruz. Haha. :)

Next it was home for dinner where they threw together a salad and fish tempura (omg yum) and ice cream. The three of us sat on the patio with the Agua de Valencia that I brought them all chilled and yummy and talked for hours. I told them about the scandals of the weekend and they giggled so much! Tee hee hee!!!

I like chilling with them all day a lot. I'm glad I got to live with them despite that week long hiccup. :) They invited me to Segovia for a day this weekend but I told them I was going on a random adventure and they thought that sounded cool.

I just Skyped Brazilian for the first time since I've been in Spain! His compy got stolen for the millionth time so he had no Skype but he got a new one in Paraguay last week and we talked for two minutes! It was exciting! Yay! ^_^

I need to clean my room. My padre said it's a "disastre" and he's right. When I come back from a trip I kinda tornado things around. Jeeze.

XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

Day 49: Cupcake Valencia and Cine de Verano

Woke up, ate breakfast, went on another interminable tour

 
(interminable not because it lacked interesting information, but because everybody was either exhausted or hung over and it was just too damn hot for a two hour walking tour),



ditched the group to explore on my own, found horchata and a slice of pizza for 4 euro, bought agua de valencia, horchata chocolate and horchata soap for souvies for my fam(s) and met up with Danielle while at Cupcake Valencia where I got two mini cupcakes and an orange juice. I figured as long as I was in Valencia, I had to at least have some OJ, even if it may not be from there. Lol. Danielle and I walked back to the bus together - during which time I recounted the sound effects of my sordid tale of the scandals of the weekend - and soon it was bus time with Dave en route back home to Alcala! Oh, bus time with Dave. He's the best busmate you could ever hope for. Tee hee. ;)


Upon returning home I had dindin with the fam then gussied up in my new, uber cheap white skinny jeans from Zara to go to the Cine de Verano with L. They show movies on the weekends during the summer in the plaza de toros so it's a rather quaint setting. :) The sound was kinda crappy so I basically understood 5% of the Spanish in the movie, but I got the general gist and was just content to be reunited with the uber smiley and happy L after my weekend with "the group." Lol. ;) I also found another boingy thing in the park nearby and boinged back and forth til my heart was content. Haha.



Pithy update, but not too much to say.
XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

sábado, 16 de julio de 2011

Day 48: Valencia, Paella and the Beach

I'm not going to lie - waking up in a room other than mine was pretty much the highlight of my day. From there, everything seemed to go downhill.

Now, now... stop thinking that. I ended up in my friend's room because my roommates were out partying 'til three in the morning and I got back earlier. Rather than wait for them, I just crashed in Dave and James' room... but it definitely was amusing to wake up and remember I wasn't in my room and that this could possibly took fishy to onlookers... LOL. What's a Study Abroad adventures with people wondering about you and your moral code, hey?! ;)

We got on the bus and went to the Fallero Museum. I had never heard of Las Fallas, but apparently it's a big deal and my Spanish textbooks just always accidentally skipped this big fiesta in the "Culture" section of the book. Brother. >_< I still don't totally grasp the concept: Basically, it's an annual celebration where they set off fireworks around Valencia and artists work all year round to create giant wooden and plaster sculptures to put together a big, tall display in the plaza. The sculptures have social and political commentary associated with them (though I couldn't disipher it) and are gorgeous and adorable.

Then, at the end of the fiesta (which includes a lot more stuff - women in gorgeous, Valenciana dresses and flowers and more fireworks, etc), they light the big sculpture of sculptures on fire and watch it burn to symbolize the start to a new year or for good luck or... I have no idea... it seems self defeating? But okay... they burn them all. But they always save one ( ... or they vote for one? I'm not sure... tricky Catalan. -->

Catalan! Yes! We studied this language in my Romance Languages class, and it's like a Latin based language that took too many drugs and is now tripping. It seems to switch between Spanish, French, Italian and Portuguese at whim, and unless you really focus, you can't quite grasp the whole of it. Quieres un ejemplo?

Em va agradar molt estar a València, però aquest llenguatge va ser una mica complicat, ja que semblava que era la llengua romanç en les drogues.

See??)

Anyway, the museum was really cute and I liked the quaint artsy nature of it all a ton! Below is my favorite sculpture they had; I thought it was adorable that the boy was painting a heart onto the ballerina doll and it reminded me a little of Mackenzie Thorpe, Fabio Napoleoni and EE Cummings. <3

 


After the strange but awesome museum, we were off on another infamous Fausto tour. At the beginning of this trip, these little Fausto expeditions were a hoot. But the thrill has worn off / it's about 20 degrees hotter than it was when he was first giving them / they're a lot easier with a tinier group who doesn't dawdle so much.

Next we went to the Ciudad de las Artes y las Ciencias (or, okay, we were already there, but we crossed the street to the official part) to check out the cool architecture and randomly encountered a dinosaur park!


There was for real a dino park randomly in the middle of everything. Dave and I had made a Dino Dance on the bus, so we were well prepared for our poses! Us doing the "raptor dance" and the "brontosaurus dance." Classic. Classy. Classically classy.
I, of course, had to Raptor Walk by the raptors. ;) DUH. *Raptor Walking to the Raptor - wait.. what?! RAPTOR OUT!*

Weee! So pretty!! Such random archetecture!!! I wish we could swim in the pool/fountain thing 'cause it's 42 degrees celcius!!!! *atleasti'mtanningaweebit*


Sometimes in this country you see weird things... like three ladies all dressed in American colors walking strollers that match their monotone outfits with babies inside the strollers that also match. The publicity/marketing moves here are strange. I wonder if they work...? We were certainly staring, but it didn't motivate any of us to go out and buy a stroller and then buy clothes to match it. Too bad I didn't get a pic of the two buxom ladies I saw later on in the trip dressed in a tight little pleather suit that showed their bare boobs and butt and had a sexy little motorcycle helmet on distributing fliers for something. I swear... publicity "stunts" here are just so intriguing.


Next it was off to the beach. I was ridiculously starving and was not pleased when the girls I was with decided we would wait an hour for a restaurant to open up so we could dine on really expensive Paella. When the bill ended up being 23 euro for Paella, a salad, a croquete and aigua velanciana - I was a little ticked off to say the least. BUT, it was true that the paella was WONDERFUL.



Keep in mind, though, "paella" just means rice and "marisco" aka an assortment of seafood. It was a great meal but definitely not worth 23 euro in my humble opinion. Sheesh. Nor was it worth missing three hours on the beach laying in the sun and tanning... although our group of girls were the only ones to not burn... hmm...



FINALLY it was beach time. I rocked my Brazilian bikini *scandal* and plopped myself on my towel in the sand for a good few hours, snoozing away and baking. I didn't get too tan, but I did get a much needed siesta in the sunshine on the southern Spanish beach of Valencia. ^_^ Yay!


From there Dave and I strolled around the little shops by the beach and then we all went home. I showered, took some much needed solo/Kiwi compy time and snoozed early while everybody else went out, got their scandal on, and didn't return 'til 5:30 am. Aren't I a little smart cookie?! Lol. Mostly I'm just too something to be able to party it up two nights in a row. That is overkill for this little chica. ;)

XOXO
Jet-set Cupcake

Day 47: Valencia

Yeah - I wasn't sure whether to look forward to the group trip to Valencia or not. I'm not much of a group girl. The only groups I've ever thrived in were DUHS, Speech & Debate Team and Hooters. Groupthink just isn't for me. I can't justify being herded like a sheep in one direction and hours later being herded back to square one and pretending to enjoy the company of those around me whom I barely know and whom I don't much care to get to know -- because I'm jaded against people roughly my own age and younger because they almost always come off as inept.


There must be something to this whole "go with the group!" thing that I'm just not wired for...? These people genuinely seem to LOVE spending their every waking moment with "the group" and won't eat or sleep or go out or potty without at least one other member of "the group" being there to hold their hand.

I just don't get it.

In small doses, sure, okay. I can do that. But please, if I'm given the option, I'm going to want to spend the majority of my time solo because not only do I get to do just what I want, but I get to be fast about it, not have to listen to stories I'm completely uninterested in and not have to waste energy being fake.

This is not to say there aren't people I enjoy - Dave has been a hoot, Megan's always good for a rant session, getting to know Erica was sweet, Dillon was enjoyable and Laura's impersonation of the Muffin video from youtube still has me giggling - I'm just saying that it'd be a lot better if I could hang out with these people one on one or in tiny, fun-sized groups. 10, 20, 30 people is too many. The end.

Anyway, the four hour bus ride set a great mood for the trip. Dave and I sat next to each other and while we fully intended to pass out for the ride, we had such a hoot talking (Dee Dee Pickles? Haha. Awesome.) and listening to music and making up Dinosaur Dance that we never even had time to snooze! Megan, on the other hand, did:


Upon arriving in the city we had a free two hours to explore (aka check out rebajas around our hotel) and then it was walking tour time with Fausto. Check the pics:





We stumbled upon a wedding along our journey through town, too! The little ring barer was so adorable! I'm going to try to photoshop this picture into perfection and might try to turn it in to the Study Abroad UW photo contest!! ^_^


After the tour it was high time to try some of this infamous Valencian Horichata. It's pretty much like sweet rice milk? I'm not sure. They are passionate about their rice in this city, though! Anyway, I liked it a lot and downed mine in seconds! Oopsies! The only time I'd tried it before was at Opus (my favorite, uber swanky/chic martini bar in Madison) when the bartender made me a Horichata martini - DELICIOUS.



Released to explore the city on our own, Gretchen and Dillion and I went in search of the Gay District. Along our adventure we encountered a really really random Renaissance market!?! ^_^ Sweet!





Also on our journey: a really cute sign for a barber shop and some pretty awesome graffiti!


I'm too tired to recount the scandalous happenings of the evening... there are some things that just cannot be recounted on my blog anyway. Let's just say that for a large amount of people, "Study Abroad" seems to be code word for "DTF." Oh, so classy...  ;)

Night night for now,
Jet-set Cupcake